What if men had, one day, decided they wanted to start a movement to be liberated from the bonds of marriage and servitude to women?
What if they had gotten sick and tired of slaving away all day to support their families, being expected to excel at business and build a life for their wife and children? What if they’d gotten tired of the weight of society being on their shoulders, and wanted instead to pursue careers unattached to marriage and children? What if they’d decided it was unfair to be expected to support a child just because they’d sired it, and wanted rights demanding they did not need to be involved in the child’s life at all if they felt like it, or that they could take it completely away from the woman and raise it without a mother if that’s what they wanted instead? What if they were able to decide to abort the child, whether the woman wanted them to or not, claiming genetic ownership of the product of their mistake? What if they wanted equal rights in divorce, to not have to pay alimony or child support?
What if men had marched in the street for the right to sleep around, challenged the teachings of the church that they be faithful to their wives, calling it oppressive and degrading? What if men had valiantly declared women to be useless, that society would be just fine without them, that a man needed a woman like a fish needed a bicycle? What if all domestic abuse cases against women were ignored while domestic abuse cases against men were exaggerated? What if all women were blamed for prison rape, for expecting men to fend for themselves and blaming that for high incarceration rates?
What if, after establishing a proud and loud notion that men needed to be liberated from the bonds of caring for the women folk, men still expected women to clean and cook and care for the children, but without commitment? What if men demanded that the state require women to preform these tasks while they went on with their lives? What if men got sick of dominating the dangerous and unwanted jobs and demanded safe, easy office jobs while sending women out to collect garbage, tend sewer systems, cut down trees, build skyscrapers, drill for oil, patrol the streets, fight fires and wars?
My point is this: if men had done this it would be disgusting, appalling and ridiculous. Men would be calling a refusal to take their responsibility to society seriously liberation from it. Not to mention, it would drastically upend all of society, as women’s liberation has. Plenty of men throughout history have not wanted to commit to or support their women, and most people would consider these men to simply be irresponsible and self-centered.
So why is it that when women no longer wanted to be expected to care for their children and husbands, it was called liberation? No woman deserves to be beaten, but this is why we need strong communities and families centered around moral values, not ideological ones. No one talks about how men used to be expected to support their families, now women are able to walk out on their marriages and demand a man still support them. If not a man, then the state. There is no more reciprocation in gender relations in our society. =
And now, men do not value women anymore, in fact, I’m pretty sure men value women a lot, lot less. Men are no longer expected to commit to the liberated women that they bed and it seems many young men are more than happy to be told they’re no longer needed to help women survive. So now you have whole generations of women who can’t find husbands, and men who view women as disposable. No one thinks husbands are needed any more. There is no longer a male sense of responsibility for women, only a demand for the state to take responsibility for women to be “liberated”. Women have demanded their own servitude to be established to central bankers and a welfare state and they proudly don their hot pink ideological shackles.
You see, the thing is, women’s liberation was the product of mostly white, middle-class women who were convinced by eugenicists and socialists that the family life was oppressive. This was a class of women who were more than cared-for, they were arguably the most privileged class of people in the world. In the last 50 years, the traditional family unit that was the backbone of community has been all but completely demonized in our culture, while conditions for women globally has barely changed. Modern American feminist are rarely concerned with the ghastly state of real male domination. They turn a blind (and perhaps terrified) eye to the ghastly state of women in the middle east at the hand of fundamentalist Islam. Rather, American women chose to rebel from a system that protected and cared for them: the traditional family unit in a society where they could already vote and own property and where men were expected to care for them. As Phyliss Schlafly wrote in 1972:
The claim that American women are downtrodden and unfairly treated is the fraud of the century.
Because husbands and fathers are needed, just like mothers and wives are needed. The reason us proponents of traditional gender roles are so adamant about our beliefs is because they work. Reciprocal relationships are practical.
Men do great things when they are motivated to impress and support women, and women do great things when they are motivated to support and care for their husbands and children. It’s a beautiful symbiosis that yes, is so often imperfect, but when it fails is when individuals are looking out for themselves and not one another. That goes for both men and women. You can’t demand someone else treat you equally, you can only try to treat them well yourself.
There were no laws in this country that prevented women from excelling before the 1960’s, women were expected to get married and have kids because that’s how children get raised. Women who succeeded in areas not typical for women worked hard, and were rewarded for it. But women who stayed home worked hard too, and were rewarded for it with happy, healthy families.
I know submitting to a man can be rough, but if you actually respect what he does for you and love him as you ought, he will love you the same and you will be his whole world. It’s not a perfect system and it won’t always work that way but it is much, much better than the mess “women’s lib” has created. You can’t preach love and tolerance if you can’t practice it.
My hat goes off to the men and women who still take care of their responsibilities and understand how rewarding-and empowering-it can be to live your life for the sake of the person you love.